It takes a village to keep a diva going.
- Dane
Keith: (Reading) Bush hired a family member to run the FDA.
JT: Is it one of the twins?
I was thinking about going down to New Orleans to help out, but then I thought… You know…
Zombies.- JT
You know, the point is to get to the end of the show. If I hadn’t said that line,
we might still be standin’ there.- Duane
That’s why I’m gonna become a dictator of a small country, get my own military, and take care of all that. I’m going to have a diamond mine Gayle, and then you can have all the diamonds you want!
- Kris
I’m sorry Gayle – there are breasts at the window. No one’s listening to a word you’re saying.
- Zicciah
Perhaps that was why he was “The Last Samurai” – because the white man came.
- Dane
Do you think I have anorexia? (Pause, as he laughs) I meant to say dyslexia.
- Zicciah
When you’re talking about intensity of orgasms, it’s like… Why are people so greedy?
- Gayle
Kris: You can do anything in this microwave, Gayle… Anything.
Gayle: Can you toast in it?
Kris: (Pause) Uhh… I don’t know.
Where’s the man in the trench coat who’s gonna take me to Hell? Why can’t
I be a superhero?- J.T.
He started giving them his “Wild Theory” – either that or he was giving them directions – but it seemed like a “Wild Theory…”
- Dane
I can’t tell if he’s gay or… Latin.
- J.T.
I wanna make our relationship work Gayle, and if that means I just shut-up… then fine.
- Josh
I have stretch-marks on my psyche.
- Desha
I was turning it from a riff to a rumor… Then I was gonna make it a lie.
- J.T.
There’s only so much Slug Soup you can eat.
- Chris H.
I kept getting my crotch grabbed – and that doesn’t happen at straight clubs.
- Kris
Richard: I don’t know what color to call this…
Gayle: It’s green.
Richard: I’m looking for a gay color, Gayle.
Gayle: Oh. Then it’s ‘Chartreuse.’
Zicciah: It’s like looking at the One dollar bill and seeing things you’ve never seen.
Crissy: There’s a One dollar bill?
What this company needs is a proper Rasputin.
- J.T.
Gayle: But, do you really want to date an actor?
Desha: No! I want to date an Accountant!
J.T.: That girl did not need to be naked.
Robbie: Yes she did. You always need a naked girl.
Porn is very personal.
- Justin
Justin: June is a difficult month for sex.
Richard: It’s the gloom of June.
Richard: As we said goodbye, we kissed… You know, alone and in the bathroom…
Kristofor: What, did you mistake it for the front door?
I play with other people’s things, but I don’t, like… probe them.
- Kris
Like, if this was a dick, I would be like… What the Fuck.
- Richard